Word of the Week

Word of the Week: Unresolved

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How often do you not sleep well because you've got something on your mind?

I am known to work out whatever is going on in my life at night. Research tells me that I'm not alone. All of our minds are funny like that. They must churn. They must seek answers. They must find resolution even if we miss our bedtimes.

But to this problem, enter the word of the week: unresolved.

Unresolved defined as what is not settled or brought to resolution.

A couple of years ago a dear friend sent me a card a quote from the poet Rainer Maria Rilke on the front saying this:

"I beg you . . . to pay attention with everything unresolved in your heart and try to love the questions as if they were locked room or books written in a very foreign language. Don't search for the answers, which could not be given to you now, because you would not be able to live them. And the point is, to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps then, someday far in the future, you will gradually, without even noticing it, live your way into the answer."

I treasure these words so because it reminds me that unresolved feelings, experiences or ambitions are just a part of the journey.

In fact, unresolved pieces in our lives are gifts, not problems to solve. What?!? How is that possible?

Consider this: maybe you didn't get to have that conversation when you wanted it but your longing for honesty will bring you to the truth at just the right time.

Maybe your doctor gave you bad news this week, but your desire to be well can lead you to healing that is deeper than you might imagine.

Maybe an unexpected situation was not how you wanted to spend some of your precious time this week, but your desire to present with others will offer you clarity about what is important to you.

So, here's my suggestion from worrier to another: make a list. Make a list of all of your unresolved things. And then, lean into Rilke's advice.

Sit with the questions. (I.e. don't start trying to fix). And see what happens.

And I believe "gradually, without even noticing it, you'll live your way into the answer." Maybe not right away. But in due time all will be well. God is with you, my friend, so there is always peace to be found.