How many times have you thought to yourself, "What a stupid idea it was to do this task alone!"
Or, "Man, I could really use an extra hand with this project."
Or, "It would so great if ____ was here with me now."
And then, felt frustrated in being alone. Bitter maybe?
To this, enter this week's word: help.
Help defined as to give assistance or support. To show up for someone in their time of need.
Help is a word so many of us, myself included, have a hard time asking for even when we're really in a bind.
We don't want to impose. We see how busy our friends are. It is so much easier if we just do it ourselves. Or what if they say no? (We hate rejection).
So, we simply carry on. And find a way to tire ourselves out.
But, when we don't ASK for what we need, we miss out on life's surprises, and what we need!
Recently, I found myself in a hard place. I didn't know how I was going to juggle all of the commitments on my plate for the next day. And I was exhausted. Sure, I could have just tarried on. Or, I could just call the friend whose name I couldn't get out of my mind. I believe, God put her name in my mind for a reason.
When I did reach out, not only did my friend say yes to helping me with my specific ask, but she volunteered to do something even more. (Something, of course I needed, but didn't even know how to articulate). And I learned this: people want to help us. They really do. It helps other people to help us.
Recently I listened to this podcast by Brene Brown. In it, she shares this about our friendships:
"If you can only help others but do not ask for the same from them, you aren't in a trusting relationship. When you think less of yourself for asking for help, what you're actually doing is thinking less of them."
Ouch, right?
It's not healthy to be the helper all the time (even if we are physically healthy or available and could say yes!).
Do we really want to think less of others?
For the truth is: we are ALL going to face seasons in life when we are going to have to ask people to do things for us that maybe we'd prefer to do on our own.
But you know what? We are going to feel more connected and grounded in belonging as we ask and receive.
So here's your homework: what help do you need to ask for this week? Who might you ask for that help?
XO
Elizabeth
