I've been thinking a lot lately about what it means to be out of step or out of sorts with the rest of your community.
Maybe it is because the tragedies of last week in Boston and in Waco, TX still lay heavy on so many of our hearts. Though the news cycle will soon move on-- for these folks in the throes of grief the journey will be a long one.
Maybe it is because for me personally, this "Sabbatical" has gone on longer than I would have liked. And I'm thinking these days a lot about what it means to be "useful." I often feel like I'm just not.
Maybe it is because I've recently journeyed with friends through the abuse of workplace authority, church doctrines that hurt instead of providing hope, and endless days of feeling life is simply not going to get better anytime soon. Heavy stuff for sure.
I tried to pull together some of my thoughts on all of this last week in piece that the Associated Baptist Press ran called, "Out of Season." In it, I stayed close to the "feeling out of sort" feeling that happens often in community life, in particular in churches. It's Easter and we're not joyful. It's Christmas and we don't feel like giving gifts. It's Good Friday and we feel like shouting with happiness. How do we relate to one another then? I think such is a discussion that we have to keep having in our faith communities.
In the meantime, as I sort through my own life, all I know is that grief takes time. Life transitions take time. Sometimes as hard as we try, we just aren't going to be in the emotional or spiritual place as everyone else. Thank goodness then for grace that finds us even on days when we are simply "out of sorts."
